Now What

Both boys are laying on the bed, covers unruffled, no energy for sex, no energy for discussion even, having seen their boat go under the wake of the navel boat pretty much at the same time they had jumped off it, both are too adrenaline low to speak, swimming ashore and getting through the locals who had gathered on the quayside to see the event had been difficult enough and then running through the narrow streets where traders and tourists stared, no doubt remembering every detail should they be asked by anyone latter, the traders hoping that maybe the information might be worth some money to someone, everyone runs for a reason and sometimes that reasons worth money, the tourists, well it will be something to tell friends back home but for both boys, the swim the run had been adrenaline fuelled and now they lay just numb. Jake just glad that they had got out of that one intact, he can feel his heart smiling on the inside, emanating out, just glad he and his brother are safe, safe to live and love again, for another day at lease. Sam is all dark, thinking, why wasn’t that it, the end, the end of both of them, would it, could it, improve from the high of the last few days when he and Jake had discovered a deep physical love for each other, a love that had been tough, tender, raw and beautiful, Sam just thinks now what is there, why wasn’t that the end of both of them, he would at least have died happy but he hadn’t died and what now, he didn’t have a clue.
Fed up thinking Sam turns on the TV and the newscasters carrying the story of Madonna being battered to death by some kid she adopted ’;stupid fucking cow’ he thinks and kills the TV, now what.